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*Kids Are Worth It!: Giving Your Child the Gift of Inner Discipline (Rev. Ed.)* by Barbara Coloroso

 




 

Kids Are Worth It!: Giving Your Child the Gift of Inner Discipline (Rev. Ed.)
by Barbara Coloroso
352 pages Collins September 2002 Paperback    

Raising kids is complex and often confusing. Barbara Coloroso attempts to put some method to the madness in Kids Are Worth It!. Her book covers a wide range of topics from alternatives to saying no to keeping your cool to bedtime and sexuality. The topics are presented as an analysis of each of three kinds of families: brickwall, jellyfish, and backbone. These three types of families can be distinguished based on their structure.

A brickwall family has very rigid structure used for power and control. In a this type of family, there is a rigid adherence to rules, and the children are often controlled and manipulated in an attempt to maintain order. Brickwall families leave little room for children to explore who they are, what they can do, and who they can become.

A jellyfish family forms the far end of the spectrum with little to no structure. A jellyfish structure often results in anarchy and chaos in both the physical and emotional environment and is wrought with inconsistencies, bribes, and threats. The environment jellyfish families create often result in children who are obnoxious and spoiled and/or scared and vindictive.

A backbone family provides structure and support. Children are provided opportunities to realize their full potential and understand their uniqueness. This is done through the delivery of six daily messages given daily:
  • I believe in you
  • I trust you
  • I know you can handle life situations
  • You are listened to
  • You are cared for
  • You are important to me
Backbone families discipline rather than punish, provide second opportunities, model competency and cooperation, teach children to think, and love unconditionally.

Kids are Worth It! provides a roadmap for backbone parenting through the analysis of parenting styles and the effect they have on a child. The book offers no miracle, demands hard work, but the rewards are worth it. Although parents may find themselves along the parenting continuum, Kids are Worth It! provides the understanding and self examination tools necessary to trend toward becoming a backbone family.

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